Family

Ok, so I have come to terms with the fact that my family does not like me and will never like me.

My father...he and I big time disagree over my mother. Maybe the understatement of the year? In short, he only cares about himself and when anyone talks to him, it's all about how his health and his life suck.

My sister...very, extremely self-centered. I don't think I can over-exaggerate that statement. She only talks to me when she needs something. She gets super pissy when people don't pay attention to her and what is going on in her life, but heaven forbid she asks you anything about yours.

My brother...he once told me that if our family were the mob, I would have been taken out a long time ago. He thinks you are worthless if you make a decision he disagrees with and he hasn't spoken to me in over a year.

None of them came to visit me at my house EXCEPT when we lived in Hawaii...free trip, ya know? No one even asked me how I was doing when I was pregnant last time with R. My father went around my aunt's funeral last December proclaiming to the whole family that I was getting divorced. My father also told me it was a waste of time and money to go back to school. After all, that is not a woman's place...especially a woman with children.

Ok, so my father comes over today...first time in like 18 months. He's never seen R. before and bitched to me earlier that I never told him I had him. Uh, why the hell would you care?! He wouldn't even hold him and barely looked at him. He then goes on about how my brother always complains that my sister never answers his emails...uh, he never even emails ME! But thanks for pointing that out, dad. I told him he should come to the range and shoot guns with us some time and he spouts off about women and shooting. I told him I have a job interview in January and nothing. I told him I graduate in spring and nothing. NOTHING! I am the first f*cking person in my family to graduate from college and I worked D*MN hard for it!! But hey, I also told my sister those two things and all she could muster up was how SHE could never go back to work and leave her kids. Yeah, thanks for the support.

I have been told that I just hate everyone. Huh?

I really wonder if I was adopted. Thank god for friends, that's all I can say. Family sucks.

Ok, so the problem...

My inlaws said they don't forgive me. This basically means they believe it was still all my fault, right? They are willing to accept the baby and everything that entails...including changing his last name to M's. However, what do I do about the future meetings with them?? I really don't have to answer to them for anything. It's not for them to judge me! I don't want to see them ever again. His mom is very judgmental and very gossipy. She used to hate me and gossip about me to his small town and their family members before, but now I just gave her something juicy to tell, I guess. I don't like it at all. For them screaming about religion to me, they certainly don't act Christ-like.

As another side note, she seems to have this idea that I do simply NOTHING around the house and M does EVERYTHING. Yeah, I'm sure. *Roll eyes* She told M to be sure that staying with me is what he wants because he'll spend the rest of his life being a slave. Oh. My. Lord.

So what do I do? For the first time in my nearly 13 year marriage, M is standing by my side with them. He told them they respect me and our decisions or else basically. However, we all know what mil's and women can be like. I really don't ever want to see or talk to them again. I mean, it's not like I live by them...at least for now. I am about ready to leave for the week they come to visit every summer.

I just don't know what to do.

Need Advice

Ok, so the reader's digest version of what's been going on is M. finally realized what the real deal of our relationship was. Good! He even goes to a therapist now and even told his parents/brothers the truth about what happened during our marriage from the beginning. Whoa!! His brothers have been understanding, his parents...ehhhhh. They were more accepting towards the baby. Weird!!

So, basically, my relationship is GREAT. I have never been so happy in my life and I'm so proud of M. I asked him what the solution would have been if I had done it the 'right way' instead of the pathway I chose. He told me that nothing else would have ever gotten him to change. It's too bad it took something that dramatic for results! Because everyone sees me as the evil one and him as the victim. Ahhh, must be nice to live in a perfect world!

So, now I need advice about how to deal with a certain situation. I'm really in uncharted territory in my issue. Anyone? What would my MOM do???