Whew!!

Ok, so M. has a pretty famous comedian friend of his. His wife was due right before Christmas and M. talked to him about my photography site and one thing led to another...they asked me if I would come and do some newborn shots for them. Woot!! But wait...a wee bit (ok, a LOT) nervous. LOL

So, last night his wife emails me and says she'd like some of the other three children and some with her. Ah, ok...more time, but sure. Two boys, a girl and the newborn...and the girl had an attitude on her that was larger than TEXAS. Boy, she was a toughy. I first thought I got maybe a few good ones, but I would have to proof them to know for sure. I mean, I took an almost 2 year complete hiatus from photography. This was like my push back off the diving board!

I was so excited to see some really good shots! I, of course, LOVE most the newborn's pictures, but I think I got at least a couple each of the other three kiddos. Mom was beautiful and that always makes for great shots. I even talked dad into holding him for a quick second before he ran out the door. I'm so glad because I got the most precious shot of dad and baby looking right at each other. Even M. thought that picture was heart-warming.

The one thing I really don't like is when they ask me what camera I use and what editing software I use. I know the tendency is to think that hey, if I get that exact camera, I can get pictures that good too! I wish it were that easy. LOL Maybe if they knew exactly what goes into make one picture: finding the light, set ISO, set ap., set shutter speed, and then composition...for every shot taken...then editing every shot in photoshop, then they might see how it's a very time-consuming art form. I hope I can get a few people I come across to realize this. She did give me a compliment when I showed her one on my lcd...she said she couldn't believe the clarity! :D

I haven't shown them to mom yet. I am kind of waiting to hear some other people's opinions and cc. All M. tells me is that they're all really good....blah blah blah...he loves me, loves everything I do...sort of thing. LOL

So if you are interested in telling me what you think, email me and I'll send you the link and the password. I feel like a nervous nellie. :P

Oh, oh, oh!

Ok, so I seem to always dwell on the negative. Let me tell you what my goals are for the New Year. Everyone seems to just pick willy-nilly things, but I picked goals I think I can actually accomplish!

*I am going to send out birthday/anniversary cards for every member of my immediate family...yes, even those I'm not *ahem* fond of. ;)

*I am not going to dwell on the past or the negative. Negative stuff will always be there. However, I don't have to stew on it.

And beyond that, I have a newborn for a photo shoot on Tuesday. I'm so stoked! M. has a friend that is a pretty famous comedian. They just had their forth baby and asked me if I would come and do a session for them. I have to admit, I AM a little nervous. I recently did a session for my babysitter and her kids, though, and when I started, it was like an old hat. I hope this goes just as well.

As for the rest of my life, I am on track to graduate in Spring and I have a job interview in a week and a half. It's a pretty big gig, so I'm not getting my hopes up. I'll worry seriously about a career after I graduate. I'll just go into it thinking it's good interview practice. ;)

My life it actually getting on a good track and for that I am TRULY grateful. I just kind of wonder when everyone will stop hating me? I try not to think about it and just know that I'm trying. Whatever people want to think of me beyond that is their own.

Now, just wish me luck on Tuesday!!

Family

Ok, so I have come to terms with the fact that my family does not like me and will never like me.

My father...he and I big time disagree over my mother. Maybe the understatement of the year? In short, he only cares about himself and when anyone talks to him, it's all about how his health and his life suck.

My sister...very, extremely self-centered. I don't think I can over-exaggerate that statement. She only talks to me when she needs something. She gets super pissy when people don't pay attention to her and what is going on in her life, but heaven forbid she asks you anything about yours.

My brother...he once told me that if our family were the mob, I would have been taken out a long time ago. He thinks you are worthless if you make a decision he disagrees with and he hasn't spoken to me in over a year.

None of them came to visit me at my house EXCEPT when we lived in Hawaii...free trip, ya know? No one even asked me how I was doing when I was pregnant last time with R. My father went around my aunt's funeral last December proclaiming to the whole family that I was getting divorced. My father also told me it was a waste of time and money to go back to school. After all, that is not a woman's place...especially a woman with children.

Ok, so my father comes over today...first time in like 18 months. He's never seen R. before and bitched to me earlier that I never told him I had him. Uh, why the hell would you care?! He wouldn't even hold him and barely looked at him. He then goes on about how my brother always complains that my sister never answers his emails...uh, he never even emails ME! But thanks for pointing that out, dad. I told him he should come to the range and shoot guns with us some time and he spouts off about women and shooting. I told him I have a job interview in January and nothing. I told him I graduate in spring and nothing. NOTHING! I am the first f*cking person in my family to graduate from college and I worked D*MN hard for it!! But hey, I also told my sister those two things and all she could muster up was how SHE could never go back to work and leave her kids. Yeah, thanks for the support.

I have been told that I just hate everyone. Huh?

I really wonder if I was adopted. Thank god for friends, that's all I can say. Family sucks.